又是四月将至，我们应当忧伤抑或哀悼，哀悼什么？过往的激情、理想，以及对于这些永久的消逝的愤慨吗？上海国际文学节在三月的阳光里安然度过了，在外滩的这座酒楼里，在中国听众不及八成的坐席里过去了。而华语作家的讲座也仅限于虹影。因为Qiu Xiaolong早在去年就用英语声明了：I wonder if I write in Chinese, can I still write the same story I’m writing now.有人质问中国的当代文学是否是垃圾，我不再想去思考这个问题了，我所担心的是我们如何来告诉我们的下一代，当小学的语文教育开始于囫囵吞枣，当高中课本开始删节鲁迅的文章的时候，我们将如何告诉我们的下一代，关于华语文学的意义？ 于是，这个四月，我告别了志摩美丽而大胆的爱情之梦，再次坐下来学着去体会鲁迅笔下我们永远不敢去亲尝的那些苦闷和颓唐。比起〈纪念刘和珍君〉，〈中国无产阶级革命文学和前驱的血〉几乎是嚎叫的。“我们的同志的血，已经证明了无产阶级革命文学和革命的劳苦大众是在受一样的压迫，一样的残杀，作一样的战斗，有一样的运命，是革命的劳苦大众的文学。”我无意去宣扬什么“革命文学”，但我想革命文学的要领也在于它的行动，在于它对民众的关切和对时事的敏锐，否则这“命”是万万革不起来的。所以我们在课堂上反复背诵的鲁迅“如投枪、如匕首”般的文章段落，最后也不过是现今众网络痴人万不得以而有口无心的应试交差而已，“革命”抑或“劳苦大众”则是另外一些惹人讨厌的名词了。虽然，他们偶尔也在网络间抱怨一下猪肉的价格，不过充其量也是发泄而已。 既然郁达夫和徐志摩都是要借着“小资”之风而兴起的话，那对于鲁迅的删与不删又有多少意义呢？在这个早春之夜当我突然想起鲁迅的时候，其实并没有忘记志摩的“爱眉小扎”，因为在今天，即便是爱情，我们又有多少全心全意呢？

这些日子来，频频收到诗兄的新作，而又都是新诗，抬头看看，果然已经是春天了。无论各自的境遇如何，我们都应该珍惜这眼前的春色。毕竟是春天了⋯⋯ 现将诗兄的佳作抄录如下： 一／这样洁白的阳光／莫非回到了九月下午的课间走廊／没有心思的年代／也许手上肥皂留有的清香是曾经喜欢的姑娘／曾经身上的那件白衣裳 二／那房顶迟疑的半步／还是你我的青春／如斜在河上的圆叶／绿了桥头我／我的影子／吹起一片白头／要不是耳边的微风／你也不知这样抬起头／闻到的青春／在房顶上／在春天的暖里／投向了风 三／这平坦的／也缓行的小路／还有忽来忽走的鸟声⋯⋯我的树上／光影里落下一片黑的叶子

真的享受到了博物馆免费参观的待遇，不过似乎门口的接待员并不十分乐意，想必相应的政府资金支持还未到位。参观的人数倒是如意料中的增加了不少，大多为学生，也有顺路进来看一看的游客。我是冲着中国古代人物画精品展去的，虽然该展览的质量依然能够称得上上乘，但是却并不能算作真正意义上的“人物画展”，其中风俗画，山水画占了很大一部分，而且多为上博馆藏。不过还倒有幸见到了吴伟的一幅《词林雅集》，也不能算作妄来了。

终于去做了告解,勉强可以听懂艾神父的上海话. 最近在看以马内利修女所写的《活着,为了什么》,我向来不屑于看这般命名的畅销书,但这次却不得不承认我庆幸看了此书，得以让我在领洗不久后看到以马内利修女如何在生活中感受和侍奉天主．天生不是存在于我们的理性推断中，而是存在于人心的．感谢天主让我在这四旬期内得以遇到这本书.修女不仅以她渊博的知识来讲述天主的爱德，更对世界政治局势尤其是贫困地区的人民抱有极大的关切。她对于经济全球化的分析，对于援助贫困地区的方式的讨论，关于腐败问题的斥责，都让我想到教会在我们的社会中还没有充分发挥其应有的作用。诚然，教会不等同于政府，但是教会有能力也有义务用真理和友爱去关怀那些陷入困境和误入歧途的灵魂。那些单由政府无法解决的问题，在教会的关爱中可以得到疏导。 去爱人永远是教会应该履行的义务，就象主耶稣这样爱了我们。“基督徒”这个称号并不是代表了一小部分人的某种特权，而是一种使命，因为我们是基督徒，所以我们在生活中应该时时处处以基督耶稣为榜样，我们应该高兴看到有越来越多的人能够蒙受主的洗礼，而不是将他们拒之于教堂的大门外。 在四旬期临近尾声的时候让我们多行善工，勤读圣经，在生活中将基督的精神显现给那些还未蒙受主恩的弟兄姐妹们，愿主的平安与你们同在。

Mar 2, 10am Kerry BROWN, Duncan HEWITT, Paul FRENCH, Perspectives on China Today The speech was quite interesting, the authors really did a lot of research of China. And Mr. Ducan Hewitt's opinion is very close to me. In his book , he talked about what happened in the past 50 years in China. He thinks during culture revolution a lot of people, especially scholars and senior Party leaders were killed or put into prison. Meanwhile culture revolution also changed the ethical standards.After the opening policy established, the government felt that a lot of things need to be rebuilt, not only economics, city construction but also social issues. So that's the reason why now Chinese communist Party invented the idea of "harmony society". It means the government wants to show his people his care about them. Ducan also talked about what does Chinese people believe now. He's very open-minded. He doesn't think by research he can totally understand China or Chinese people. He just wanted to say something he got from his research during all these years. He talked about the young generation. Internet is a part of their life. They are unhappy with the government's control of internet. The young generation was growing up with Japanese cartoon, western fast food and the American Channel MTV. But the education of nationalism also has a very strong influence on the young people, like anti-Japanese. To the other Chinese people, someone is really serious. Ducan also talked about the story happened in Gallerie Lafayette. He has met a taxi driver who's very excited about it. But it doesn't mean besides nationalism Chinese people are not interested in anything. People do have their private interests especially the young generation. Kerry Brown's speech was more about history which I've already know, so I'm not very interested in his words. Paul French behaved as a host of this program. All of them are both knowledgeable and humorous. Mar 8, 3pm Fatima BHUTTO in conversation with Geoff DYER, Hope and Courage in Pakistan -Media Nowadays there are many private channels, 24 hours news channels in Pakistan because and in spite of Musharraf. Before him, there was only one channel. -Lawyer Lawyers take an important place in a society, especially in a society like Pakistan. -Blog Nowadays more and more people are writing blogs. And internet control is impossible in Pakistan. -If media and law system work well, the society will become better and better. Even though now there are still many problems in our country. No national hospital, no schools for poor gals...But you should look at the people, they do have hope. -BHUTTOs BHUTTO is just a family name to me. Maybe someone would say, oh come on...But I do think so, maybe one day I can change it. I mean I don't believe this country should depends on several fancy families. But it doesn't mean I'm trying to keep away from helping Pakistan people. I do write. -Safety I don't feel unsafe in Pakistan. But it doesn't mean that I feel totally safe like an idiot. No. Suicide bombing could happen everyday, people are wearing the concerning of it if you look at their eyes you can feel this. -Islam Islam is not a problem. The government is a problem. -China China historically has a great relation with Pakistan. Now China is helping Pakistan building roads. I mean they are really helping, not like some other countries, after one month they left. Like after the earthquake in 2005, only 2 countries stayed to help, one was Cuba the other was China. -Democracy We don't want Indian democracy, we don't want American democracy, we want Pakistan democracy.